Anger is an interesting emotion…
One can talk about how unhealthy it is to be angry all the time, or how it can help create illness in your body, or how it can even disrupt friendships and damage them to the point of no return.
But the thing is, if you don’t know how to control your anger or your rage, you will lead a very poor lifetime.
It’s as simple as that.
I used to get angry myself living at home. My parents used to come out with irrational reasons why something had to be done…
That in itself isn’t a bad thing, and can be easily overlooked and ignored.
But when the same parents display traits such as narcissism, and lack of consideration towards your feelings about a subject (until much later), and then to go as far as to be talked over and ignored, soon anger and rage become a very obvious side effect to this one-dimentional family relationship.
The thing is, by the time I realized that my parents were at one level, causing me to feel angry, it was too late. The damage had been done.
Having suffered from sleep deprivation over the years, the anger was also fueling my anxiety and even had a helping hand in my panic attacks. Anger is also responsible in making me loose the present moment, and stop enjoying life.
Again, that isn’t necessarily too much of an evil thing, one could argue. Some people could get really cold and say that you have to simply, ‘get over it’ and move on. Fair enough!
But anger and rage have another trick up their sleeve…a trick that few people are aware off…
They are emotions, which means that for you to, ‘feel’ them, certain chemicals in your body have to be released. The chemicals that are released to form anger and rage causes damage to your body, and can even shut down important aspects of your self.
It has been said that 1x 5 minutes of anger can reduce your immune system for up to 6 hours!
Suddenly, not fair enough…this has to be stopped, or you could cause some significant harm to yourself.
We all know the physical symptoms of anger, from Headaches to Fatigue, from increased blood pressure to even Heart palpitations. And yet, despite the harmful effects of anger, around 25% of men have uncontrolled anger!
Now don’t get me wrong, a tiny bit of anger isn’t necessarily a bad thing. One could correctly say that it can be a great energy to deal with, to help you make better plans for your self and you family. But the question ultimately becomes this…can you discipline yourself to feel anger only for a short period of time, so you don’t cause too much injury because of it?
Its a good question!
So lets look at the 10 best ways of controlling and reducing your anger, so you don’t let the burning feeling consume and mentally eat you alive.
1 – Watch you thoughts
Sounds kinda obvious, but just the act of watching your thoughts can be a great way to reduce and eliminate your anger. If you know that a certain word or image is going to set you off, don’t think of it. Try to distract yourself, and actually put the mental effort into changing the thought, so you think more inspiring ones then negative ones. If you can, try…
2 – Practicing mindfulness throughout the day
Just by randomly choosing times to be right here, right now will be great at diffusing any anger/rage inducing imagery which may set you off and cause you stress. Just using your peripheral vision alone is a great way of reducing the mental chit-chatter and will allow you to lift the fogginess of your mind, think more clearly, and actually restore your inner peace.
3 – Use NLP to eliminate the image
You can use a form of NLP, where you actually get into a quick habit of taken a mental snapshot of the picture of your mind that is causing you to be angry, and then shrinking it and making it disappear within a second to the corner of your vision. It does sound too simple for it to be true, but this method actually works. And if you can get your-self into a habit of doing this, you’ll find your general anger will be substantially reduced.
4 – Learn to forgive
Sounds weird, but forgiveness is still very under-utilized by some folk, despite it’s obvious benefits. To forgive, see the blessing in disguise, and then let go. This will be the toughest part, as we are taught to not let go. But letting go doesn’t mean that you are justifying what the person/ group have done that is causing you to be angry, but accepting what has happened. And when you learn to accept life, it can be remarkably peaceful. Not that it’s easy mind you…
5 – Count backwards from 10 and learning emotional discipline
Can be a great little trick to delay any negative response, as well as anger/rage. Just by quickly counting backwards from 10 can delay an angry image to flash up, and can stop you from loosing your inner peace.
5 – Become creative
Sometimes being creative can be a great way to reduce and eliminate anger, such as writing down your angry thoughts, and making a scorching letter. This can be a very peaceful way of letting the energy of anger leave you, and can help relax your soul.
7 – Use exercise to relax
Of course, if you are not the static person, try something kinetic instead, like jogging, or hitting the punch bag…something that can allow you to release steam. By burning some of the excess energy you get from anger, you will feel slightly exhausted, but on the plus side you will also be partially recovered.
8 – Breath deeply and slowly during the heat of moment
And by this, I mean belly breath deeply and smoothly, which will not only allow you to keep yourself from loosing your cool, but allows you to become slightly present as well as give mental clarity. Deep breathing has many health benefits, and it is easy to see why, as we have trained ourselves to shallow breath as part of normal everyday life.
9 – Learn to meditate
Naturally, prevention is always better than cure, so to reduce any future anger and rage attacks from harming your psyche, try to take up meditation. No, it doesn’t mean that you have to sit with your back straight, legs cross for hours upon hours (although fair play to you if you do;-) but it can mean just 10-15 mins of lying down on your bed, or sitting in your chair, just watching your breath and paying attention to any thoughts that you think off.
10 – Have a good laugh.
Of course, sometimes a good old fashioned laugh is in order to save the day! And when I mean laugh, I mean to genuinely find the funny side of what has happened. Admittedly, this will not always be easy, but if you can somehow get into a habit of seeing the funny side, not only will you stop yourself from getting angry, you’ll also have a blast while doing it.
Practicing the above steps will sure fire your way to success in reducing anger and rage. Don’t harm your body by suffering from these emotions Instead, be emotionally smart, re-gain clarity of thoughts, and keep your inner peace.
You life depends on it;-)